While the Music Lasts
BY Lucas BakerBoasting the slogan “Radiate Positivity,” Bonnaroo Music Festival is a breeding ground for joyfulness and lasting memories. Even at 3 a.m. on a Saturday morning, the first year I attended Bonnaroo, I still felt alive with energy. Although I was dirty and exhausted, I was not ready to return to my tent. After sweating all day in the unrelenting Tennessee sunlight, the only thing that kept me on my feet as I came upon the all-night dance party was the beginning of “Drunk in Love” by Beyoncé. Carried by the Bonnaroo message, I approached a beautiful girl with long blonde hair dancing on the outside of the party; her voice silvery, she told me her name was Caroline through a soft smile. Wearing a crown of wildflowers and a black floral sundress, she danced gracefully in the flashing neon lights. She was in her own world, and she welcomed me. We locked eyes and energetically sang every word of the song together. Seemingly dreamlike, the world spun as we alternated between screaming and whispering the lyrics at different parts of the song. We were passionately in sync. We were surrounded by thousands of people, but all I could hear was the music, her voice, and the repeated jingling of her necklaces. Suddenly, I was forced back into reality as Caroline’s friends took her away. The song had ended, and the magic we had created slowly faded away. That was the last time I saw her.
In a place with over 70,000 people at Bonnaroo, it can often be hard to find privacy and intimacy. However, Caroline and I created this intimacy among a sea of people. We separated ourselves from the noises and distractions while engulfed in them. In that short moment, love, the most powerful of all emotions, fervidly existed. Author Barbara Fredrickson wrote about this idea of momentary love in her book Love 2.0: “Love, like all emotions, surfaces like a distinct and fast-moving weather pattern, a subtle and ever-shifting force” (Fredrickson). According to Fredrickson, love is not only an intimate emotion between two people developed gradually. Fredrickson argues that love can be spontaneously forceful, claiming that in these situations, love is brief but authentic (Fredrickson). She defines these “micro-moments of love” as moments when love is present due to a connection over a shared positive emotion between two or more people, even strangers (Fredrickson). These connections can occur through something as simple as a smile or conversation. In my experience, I fully made this connection with a complete stranger. Caroline and I experienced happiness together. She fed off of my positive energy, and I hers. We connected without restrictions, building a relationship on joy and love. We were boundlessly and unapologetically open to one another, which deepened our connection. We flowed harmoniously and sang each word flawlessly, never fearing judgment from each other or those around us. Forgetting the long and tiring day in the sun, we smiled, laughed, and sang in unison; we fully existed and loved one another in that moment.
At its core, love blossoms due to a connection “over a shared positive emotion, be it mild or strong” (Fredrickson). Therefore, love can develop organically anywhere and anytime there are two or more people present. Based on Fredrickson’s definition, love can originate from the desire to share positive emotions with those around us. Fredrickson explains that this power of love “can even give you a palpable sense of oneness and connection, a transcendence that makes you feel part of something far larger than yourself” (Fredrickson). By this logic, love often flourishes through the bonds developed as a result of our desire to share positive emotions with one another. We are happiest when we are happy with others. Although the connection bridged between Caroline and me was strong, it was indeed brief. We were fully joined in shared love in one moment, and she was gone the next. Moments such as this can form the foundation of any strong relationship. Occurring with friends, family, and partners, love is continually built through shared micro-moments. A connection based in a shared positive emotion sows the seeds of love.
Accordingly, Fredrickson argues that love “resides within connections,” and these connections are the basis for brief micro-moments (Fredrickson). What most people fail to notice, although some occurrences might be more recognizable than others, is that these types of connections occur frequently in their everyday lives. From sharing a laugh about a video to realizing shared interest with another person in an underground musician, micro-moments, backed by interpersonal connections, are more common than we think. This is not to undermine the significance of love but only to identify its prevalence. Since my experience with Caroline at Bonnaroo, I have recognized and been more receptive to micro-moments in my everyday life.
I often think of Caroline and the T.S. Eliot line that says, “You are the music / While the music lasts.” The song “Drunk in Love” was playing for the entire duration of my interaction with Caroline, and it was the focus of our connection; however, it was only the medium through which we created our own music, two souls harmonizing in the brevity of a single song. Bonnaroo fosters an environment that promotes openness and happiness; however, it is not like this everywhere. Nevertheless, each second possesses infinite potential for love, but only if we let it.
Works Cited
Eliot, T.S. “The Dry Salvages.” DavidGorman.com. n.d. Web. 20 January 2016.
Fredrickson, Barbara. Love 2.0: Creating Happiness and Health in Moments of Connection. New York: Plume, 2014. Print.